


The Tenuousness of Light

by Dolimir



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-05
Updated: 2011-06-05
Packaged: 2017-10-20 04:26:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/208721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dolimir/pseuds/Dolimir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’s harder than I thought it’d be.”<br/>“What is?”<br/>“Redemption.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Tenuousness of Light

Severus Snape stalked into his laboratory, his mind going over the list of ingredients he would need for his latest experiment. But as he reached his well-worn worktable, he felt a strong, yet timid, presence behind him. He swirled, making the most of his billowing cape, an act he had perfected over the years guaranteed to petrify wayward students.

Wand at the ready, he studied the far shadowed corner. “Show yourself.”

“You realize that if I was a first year I’d probably would have just soiled myself.”

Severus relaxed his stance and tucked his wand back into his robes. “True, but then you would have immediately threatened me with the wrath of your father.”

“God, I was such a spoiled prat back then.”

“Back then?”

A soft chuckle emanated from the corner before Draco Malfoy stepped out into the sparse light of the lab. To the casual eye, he was as classically handsome as ever; but Severus saw the dark circles under his former protégé’s eyes, practically felt the bone-tired weariness that radiated off the young man in waves.

“To what do I owe the…pleasure of your company this evening?”

Draco’s form disappeared back into the shadows.

At first, Severus wasn’t sure if Draco would answer his question, but after several moments of silence the answer came softly, as if arriving from a far distance. “It’s harder than I thought it’d be.”

“What is?”

“Redemption.”

“What are you talking about, Mr. Malfoy? You gained redemption at the end of the war, when your part in the end game was made public.”

A harsh laugh echoed around the room. “Ah yes, Dumbledore’s famous spy. The traitor who saw the light in order to save his family’s wealth.”

“We both know that’s not true. The Ministry--”

“Doesn’t give a shit. I’ve inherited my family’s wealth, their properties. The Ministry only cares that all the dark magic has been removed from the Manor and I’m properly leashed. I’m…I’m on my own now.”

“And you’ve never been on your own before?” Severus said, more than asked, in quiet understanding.

“Yes. No. I mean…It’s the whispers behind my back. It’s the howlers from righteous middle-aged witches cursing my very existence. It’s the silence that greets me wherever I go.” The quiet voice quavered with suppressed emotions. “How ever did you survive it?”

Snape took several steps forward, until he could see the vague outline of his former student. “Dumbledore offered me a teaching position, where I could reside in peace, work on my projects and terrorize generations of children.”

“I don’t suppose Headmistress McGonagall has any teaching positions open at the moment?” The raw pain stabbed through Severus like a rusty sword.

“You don’t want to teach,” said gently.

The retort was immediate and loud. “I don’t want to live like this anymore! I can’t!” There was a moment of awkward silence. “My apologies, Professor. I shouldn’t have imposed on your time.”

Draco tried to step forward, but Severus refused to move, keeping the younger man boxed in the dark corner.

“Do you know why I used to pair you up with Mr. Potter?”

“Because you were a sick, sadistic bastard.”

“Besides that obvious conclusion.”

Draco remained silent.

“It was because Potter needed balance,” Severus told him, as if explaining the obvious. “He needed someone who didn’t fawn over him, who would force him to think about his actions. He needed to be normal, if only for a little while.”

“But why me?” came the whispered response.

“Because you were my best and my brightest.”

“I was only eleven.”

“So was he.” Severus took another step closer, his eyes having adjusted to the lack of light, and took in Draco’s dejected slouch.

“A man’s integrity is not measured by what he does when the world is watching him, but by what he does when it isn’t. Without the information you provided Dumbledore, Potter wouldn’t have achieved half the things he did. If he had been left unchecked as a child, he might very well have grown to believe he deserved the adulation the idiots around him caked upon him. Without having seen what living with darkness did to a person, he would never have appreciated the light. Without you, he might never have learned regret.”

Draco watched him for several seconds in silence, then nodded once. “Thank you.”

He tried once again to move around Severus and while Severus allowed the movement, he stopped Draco’s progress by placing his hand on his arm. “For?”

Draco didn’t meet his eyes. “For believing in me.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “For being my light when I was surrounded by darkness.”

Gripping Draco’s chin, Severus lifted the young man’s face until their eyes met. “I always will be.”

“Always?”

“Yes, always.”

He placed a gentle kiss on Draco’s forehead and wrapped his arms around Draco’s too-thin torso when the young man melted against him. Maybe he could convince Minerva to create a position after all.


End file.
